Dealing with the Pick-Up Time Blues

The work life balance is an act that most parents learn after a little bit of struggling.  As much as you would love to be with your children all day, every day it just isn’t a feasible reality for most of us.  Enter the world of daycare.  A saving grace for most working parents with little ones. 

At first, the idea of daycare can be daunting to your toddler.  New people, new surroundings, new routines – some toddlers just aren’t for it.  Queue the early morning tantrums, fully equipped with tears and runny noses.  Then, some time goes by and maybe the idea of spending the day with friends and some nice teachers isn’t so bad.  They get used to it.  Finally, and unfortunately for some parents, the toddler decides they love it so much they don’t want to leave.  Just the sight of a parent at pick up time can cause a full-blown tantrum with kicking, screaming, tears and again…runny noses.

Don’t worry, it’s not you!  Although you are your child’s rock, you have to remember how a toddler’s mind works.  They are very present-focused.  They don’t think of past or future.  When they see you at pick up time, they know that right now they are having a lot of fun and right now they do not want to leave.  There are three major ways you can help ease the pick-up time blues for your toddler.

First, acknowledge the feelings.  Talking to children about their emotions is extremely healthy for social development and helps them understand why they’re feeling the way they feel.  Sometimes, in these conversations you can remind them that they’ll be back tomorrow to see all of their friends and that you missed them so much during the day.  The conversation isn’t only healthy for your little one, but also inadvertently takes their mind off of the reason they’re upset. 

Next, at the beginning of the day, try to give your toddler something to look forward to that you can remind them about at pick up.  Whether it’s their favorite meal for dinner, or getting to play with their dog, these little things can help generate excitement around pick up time 

Finally, know that it is nothing against you.  Sometimes, as parents, you can internalize emotions your children have and blame yourself.  This is 100% normal and has nothing to do with your parenting skills or lack thereof.  

Do you have any suggestions for “the pick-up time blues?” Let us know in the comments!